Life from my view

I read this article the other day about finding self and purpose "Unbecoming Who You Are and Embracing Your True Self"  It was really interesting and I had a few take aways from it. 1. Realizing that I do not know who I am is the 1st step and then make steps to find that person For the first time in my adult life.... I am single. Like really single, there is no "almost done" relationship or "friends with benefits" or guy I am talking to seriously.  It is just me, myself and I. What do I do when my phone is as dry as the Sahara? 2. I am scared. I realized that I have this overwhelming fear of being alone as well as fear of being vulnerable. I wore a mask of this strong, confident woman covered up by my education and ambition. When in actuality I am a scared woman searching for myself in the midst of lifes distractions. School was my out, my way of becoming "safe" You can not take away my knowledge. Once you know something you cannot unknow

AH YES, BLACK WOMEN DATING WHITE MEN. WELL, MAYBE I WILL HAVE A LITTLE EXPERIENCE WITH THIS SOONER RATHER THAN LATER. EVE FOUND HER PRINCE CHARMING..... FIRST, I HAVE NEVER ACTUALLY DATED OUTSIDE MY RACE, I THOUGHT ABOUT IT AND EVEN ENTERTAINED CONVERSATIONS ABOUT IT, BUT NEVER FOLLOWED THROUGH BUT WHY NOT? YOU ASK........ IT JUST SEEMED WEIRD, THEY ASK QUESTIONS ABOUT "NORMAL BLACK PEOPLE STUFF." I THOUGHT, AND STILL DO THINK THAT WE WILL NOT HAVE THE SAME INTEREST SUCH AS MUSIC, MOVIES, FOOD AND LIFE IN GENERAL. WILL HE EAT RUDY'S CHICKEN? HOW DOES HE MAKE KOOL-AID? HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW WHO LUTHER VANDROSS IS? ARE HIS PARENTS RACIST? QUESTION I WOULD HATE TO HAVE AN ANSWER TO IF THEY WERE. WITH THE CURRENT SOCIAL CLIMATE... WILL I BE PERCEIVED AS A TRAITOR? I HAVE NEVER CARED WHAT OTHERS THOUGHT OF ME, WON'T START NOW. SO WHY START NOW? WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD YOU EVEN TRY AND DATE A WHITE GUY GIRL? WELL TO ANSWER YOU, WHY NOT? WE SAY WE LOVE LEAR

I will dive directly into this one. No quote, no pictures to relate to. How well do you know yourself? What are your wants and needs? What are you willing to compromise on? Are you a leader? Are you a listener? What do you believe in? What are your standards? Who affects you? What are your priorities? What makes you, YOU? What is your love language? How do you communicate? What are your flaws in your own eyes? Are you willing to change? What do you want your life to look like? What legacy will you leave behind? What is your plan? Who do you love? What are your fears. These are all questions that you answer through self evaluation. The past few months have been time for me to self evaluate, make some changes, try some new things, make some decisions, walk away from situations, stand on my own, learn life lessons and let my voice be heard. Well, I know myself pretty well now. I know that from now on I cannot compromise my being for temporary satisfaction. I am a wonderful listener.

Update: I completed my 24 hours of solitude- which according to my friends is more than enough time to get over a breakup lol.  Upon completion- I have since ventured into the world of happy hours! Called up one of my sorors headed and headed to Plano. I figured that if I am to meet someone I must get out there. So I did.  Had a good time, not too much pressure on myself and just chilled out, did not try too hard and voila! 2 numbers and a possible date.   This morning while deciding to write this particular blog... I ran across a recent article about dating in dallas. It was quite true and entertaining. We have limited date night options besides eating- there are no beaches, mountains or lush green areas. Since we have to eat- most restaurants offer you the down home, southern fried, BBQ sauce dipped, tex-mex options in very large portions- talk about gaining weight if you are on the dating scene. Not to mention the guy that works in a call center making 15/hr calls himself