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Breathe Again

Was not sure what to title this particular post. So many new things and blessings happening in my life right now.

For starters let me say God has really been pouring into my life these past 2 months alone and I can truly say that I tried him. Now-- he is trying me lol. I made 1 year on my trek to celibacy Aug 3, 2016!! It was a struggle, I cried a lot and I had to dig deep in order to get to the root of why I even started having sex before marriage. Past the surface self esteem stuff and actually come to grips with the fact that I was lost. I knew so much and so little at the same time. Wanting to be loved, not knowing what it truly was or how to properly give it. So year 1- done! The level of growth and being able to see these guys for what they are right then and there has truly saved me some time and energy.

A (BOY) and I emphasize boy because of his mindset tried for several months to invite himself to my place of residence after I clearly stated my stance on celibacy and even just what dating me meant and once I truly told him look " I'm dating someone so you missed your opportunity" it became a game in his mind of whose line is it anyway because his ego was hurt. He then said " I was not looking to be serious like that anyway" My response was "EXACTLY so why did you try so long and now you are free to call the next chick in your contacts and try her- cuz I am not the one!" several you good, I'm good text later I just deleted the conversation- good luck in life homie.  I swerved on that headache, non committal and everything else that could have come along with him. #ThankUGod

I also started a new job and I now realize why I am in recruitment and what God has been preparing me for. Evangelism- my need to travel and love for helping others become the best version of themselves professionally and finding their niche. That is basically what evangelism is... and he is making me ready to do it for him. He takes your natural God given earthly talents and expects you to use those talents for his kingdom. I see it now.

But I love my new company and my team I feel included and like they are really investing in me as a whole person not just the professional.

First mission trip to Haiti- July 2017- First installment paid today!!! I am excited and beginning to study so that I can receive what it is he has for me. I am ready to go to the next level in my relationship with God.

There are also some new people coming into my life that are challenging me in ways that I usually shy away from. Being able to talk with someone who is just as intelligent and goofy as I am is refreshing. I do not have to be on guard all the time, he is, I guess what I need in my life. Thankful for the transition and everything that has happened over the past year to get me ready to even see it. The breakup, cutting people off, moving, new jobs, walking away from other projects and finding the real me. It was not easy but I am grateful to all the situations that created the makings of me. Lessons learned, tears shed- the good and the bad.

 More to come on that....at a later date



I am actually learning to sew... can you believe it!! Got my sewing machine (investing in self) I am back learning French and of course still reading for leisure.

Finally finished "The Wait" By Devon Franklin and Meagan Good- I am glad I waited until now to read the book- it helped me finish this first year celibacy  journey out strong!! I have faith and it may already be happening- who knows. Waiting and Working..... Breathing- Living

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