Skip to main content

The importance of boundaries

As I sit here in DFW international airport reading "Don't Settle For Safe" by Sarah Jakes Roberts, I am compelled to write on the importance of setting boundaries.

Boundaries keep us safe. Safety is a primary foundational component of Maslow's hierarchy of needs. Basically, we need boundaries at our core in order to survive.

Relationships are one of the hardest areas of our lives to create and maintain boundaries. Why is this? Our need for acceptance tugs at our inner being to disregard the natural boundaries that our conscience created for us. Whatever it may be- friends, significant others, parents or siblings we want to be accepted. But at what cost do we pursue acceptance?

As I have grown and matured in all things called life, I realized that I had created boundaries that were too loose as well as disregarded others all together. I had to realign myself to think in terms of boundaries when approaching any situation.

Here are a few of the questions I asked myself during that realignment stage.

1. Is this thing or person worth my inner peace, energy or time?
If it's no.... Leave it alone

2. If you answered yes, what time frame? How will you measure failure or success of this interaction?
If it fails.... Leave it alone

3. It succeeded so what's next?

These questions allow you to keep your boundaries at the forefront so that at any moment you can say you know what this is not working- I am indebted to myself to cut this off right here and now.

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Check out this review of LARK on the Park on Google Maps https://goo.gl/maps/6Rb5soDtvrr
1 comment
Read more

Single But Ready: Greater is Coming

So I am up doing some grass roots research into pursuing some passions of mine... hair and fashion.  While texting a guy who is interested in me. And it hit me. I am ready to date again! Finally. Lordt I thought I was going to be stuck in that negative stage forever! By the way the title of this post is inspired by a podcast that I listened to- that helped get me through entitled: Single But READY.. check it out it is eye opening. So if you read some of my post from the August/September period you will note the harping of the breakup and my efforts to rebound date. Well I never wrote about my perspective of trying to rebound date. Let us just say it was horrible. I truly do not recommend trying to rebound date, while being celibate and on the tail ends of a heartbreak... Nothing good comes from Nazareth right? HA.. ok. Basically as I sat here thinking back to that time period I was sooo negative. Negative Nancy welcome to the party. These guys were showing genuine interest in m...
Post a Comment
Read more

Travel Chronicles- Hot Springs, AR

Wonderful- Wonderful- Wonderful trip. Very relaxing- great small town feel. Where did we stay- "The Springs Hotel" Ok so we could have chosen a better hotel but it was cheap and "on the strip" Right near the national park and walking distance from most of the other sites. This hotel was archaic but what do expect from a 3 star hotel that raves about dead visitors lol.... it looked like a haunted hotel, the bed had a quilt that looked like my great great grandmother created it, no microwave or fridge, the outlets had rust coming out of them- not sure how safe that is, no hair dryer and one chair in the corner that was forest green- but hey we were not there for the hotel. Things to do: Hike in the national park- we took the "Dead Chiefs Trail" I was tired but bae on the other hand was Mr.Dora The Explorer. We ran into the old navy hospital turned asylum and it looked haunted as well. There is a theme going here. But there were small pockets of hot sprin...
Post a Comment
Read more