Skip to main content

Much To Do About YOU!

So it is week one of my Jenny Craig... the food is good but mannn I still be hungry. My best friend and I are on a mission though to get healthy and happy and this is the first step in that journey. So far so good.... I have not got on a scale yet but hey I feel better and more energized and I am making a conscious decision to change my life. When we go to Vancouver in March we gone be cute!! We are always on point but you know confidence level will be on 150. Plus we gotta be in shape being that we will be taking the naturistic approach such as bike riding and hiking.

Oh yeah.... finally moved and loving my new place... it is purely me... back to being my sanctuary, my place to get away from all the other stuff.

On to what this post is truly about. So, I am somewhat back on the dating scene and God I did not realize how being in tune with yourself can open your eyes to everything! the past, present and future. My mother has always told me that it would take a VERY strong and patient man to deal with me and I would of course always roll my eyes and be like I am NOT that difficult. I knew I had smart mouth and my sarcasm could overflow at times but I always felt I was a simple girl... not requiring much..... but recently I realized I was lying to myself. I am DIFFICULT and I accept that.

Mariah said: I didn't know you, cause I didn't know me, but I thought I knew everything.....#Past
Drake said: I have always been me, guess I know myself.... running through the 6 with my woes #Present
Brad Paisley said:Sometimes when you lose yourself, it is just as well because that is when you find yourself #future

What makes me difficult? I can go from 0 to 100 real quick and you never know when. My mood changes often and unbeknownst to those around me. Cry one minute, laughing the next and serious the next.... I never know lol just go with the flow.Usually I am passive and quiet and in my own head I start to get mad at some past sin and then I dont talk for 3 days... I am so used to being in my own world that its hard to try and explain to others or better yet let them in... they don't understand. So now that I have accepted my self and flaws I can be more open to sharing with someone else. While in denial these issues would come up and they boil into an argument. Now I just lean back.. lean back.

Your relationship with self is key before engaging in any other relationship whether with friends, family or dating So I know this... now what?

Make some changes and realize that everyone is not for you. Everyone will not understand your journey or your thoughts. Mama was right- it is going to take a special kind of man to handle me and all my moods and my shoe addiction. So I cannot be mad when it does not work out- becuase there were signs along the way to say- yeah, no this is not the one for you. If you cannot deal with my craziness or at least help me navigate through it then sorry you do not have the golden ticket... go make someone else miserable... not I. Learning to say No has been my biggest struggle. It is ok to say No... Be in tune with yourself. Build a relationship with self then go share that love with someone else.

Work In Progress.... Coming Soon

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

In search of magic

She told me something was missing. Not a spark or a twinkle Not a light or a star Not a fire or an ember My magic was missing. The very thing that allowed me to create the me I wanted to be, had long gone missing He took it, I said, and I want it back! I want it all back. Slowly she felt it returning- but she had to figure how to use it again. Never again would she let someone steal her magic. Never again would she freely give of her magic. Never again would she take for granted the magic that was given to her as her prized possession. And when she said it- she felt it- the magic she once knew had returned and oh how it had grew. It was undeniable, unimaginable- she realized that the magic was her, she had never left- she had only forgotten due to his curse. She realized what she had forgotten; she had placed her magic safely on a shelf far, far away from what she called her heart. Hidden from all others, even herself- because she was too weak to control it ...

Current Playlist

So I have exceptional taste in music or so I believe.... it ranges from gospel to rap to classical. Check out some of the songs. Meghan Trainor: Like I'm Gonna Lose you ft. John Legend Jonathan McReynolds: No Gray Ciara: Paint It Black Nils Frahm: Me Monica: Before You Walk Out My life J. Moss: Good & Bad Kehlani: Niggas Lawrence Flowers: More Hans Zimmer: Time Tori Kelly: Art of Letting You Go Rihanna: Stay Beyonce: 7/11 Jessie J: Burnin' Up Trey Songz: I Know Meek Mill: Dreams and Nightmares Kirk Franklin: Don't Take Your Joy Away Ying Yang Twins: Get Low Adrian Marcel: 2AM Donnie McClurkin: Just For Me Jhene Aiko: Comfort Inn Kevin Gates: #IDGT Kid Ink: Show Me Boyz II Men: Doin Just Fine Joelle: Wish I Never India Arie: River Rise Casting Crowns: Who Am I Angel: Anita Baker Ryuichi Sakamoto: Bibo no Aozora Destiny's Child: Bad Habit Fantasia: Aint Gon Beg Karina Pasian: Last To Know Boosie: Like A Man Brandon Hines: Yes You Are ...

Sucking at life but #Queening

Unfortunately I am the person who can never make a decision right off. I have so many ideas and thoughts running through my head and there is never just one option. Why are there always so many options? There are options for everything and it kind of freaks me out. I am that person standing at the crossroad with basically 3 other directions to go besides the one you came from. Yeah that is where I am in life right now. I want to go everywhere and do everything besides what I have already done. At least going back is not an option and neither is staying where I am... I have to decide on something at sometime. Even the greatest of leaders suffer from indecision. I am afraid that my indecisiveness might lead into inaction which is unacceptable on any front. That is why I impulse decide usually- due to indecisiveness... just make a decision already! Done. So what is it that I cannot make a decision on? Well right now... this living situation of mine. It's time to move from my apa...