Life from my view

She told me something was missing. Not a spark or a twinkle Not a light or a star Not a fire or an ember My magic was missing. The very thing that allowed me to create the me I wanted to be, had long gone missing He took it, I said, and I want it back! I want it all back. Slowly she felt it returning- but she had to figure how to use it again. Never again would she let someone steal her magic. Never again would she freely give of her magic. Never again would she take for granted the magic that was given to her as her prized possession. And when she said it- she felt it- the magic she once knew had returned and oh how it had grew. It was undeniable, unimaginable- she realized that the magic was her, she had never left- she had only forgotten due to his curse. She realized what she had forgotten; she had placed her magic safely on a shelf far, far away from what she called her heart. Hidden from all others, even herself- because she was too weak to control it ...

So do not judge me this go around... but my choice in music is sort of a good indicator of where I am in life attitude wise and this playlist will probably make you believe that I am a 15 year old girl obsessed with Pop culture lol but hey I am in a good place right now lol Side Note: Still listen to my classical music every night... so there I am still a grown up  Heartbreaker: Justin Bieber Work From Home: 5th Harmony Wild Things: Alessia Carr No: Meagan Trainor Work: Rihanna Collide: Justine Skye Captivated: Lawrence Flowers Brand New Me: Alicia Keys Emotion: Destiny's Child Let It Go: Chonique Sneed Exchange: Bryson Tiller All That Matters: Justin Bieber Show Me Your Face: William McDowell Cut It: O.T Genasis Indigo: Sammie At Your Name: Phil Wickman You Need Me: Jacques Picture Me Rollin: Chris Brown Formation:Beyonce Hollow: Tori Kelly Love Again: Ethan Farmer Understanding: Xscape Runnin: Kehlani Say It: Tori Lanez Burnin UP: Jessie J Mind over ...

Finding yourself is a wonderful experience. Realizing who you are- it feels  like a great awakening! It  is freeing and challenging at the same time. Breaking chains or habits that have become second nature to you is not an easy feat. We all have things that we wish we could change about ourselves at some point and time. My question now is why not. Why not chase your dreams? Why not move? Why not fall in love? Why not be who you were purposed to be? In life- things get in the way- it is called life. How you deal with those distractions will determine how far along you get on this journey. It really hurt me to find out that Kehlani (one of my fav artist right now) attempted suicide. I pondered thinking WOW- what was so bad that she wanted to end it all. Here she is this gorgeous, talented, free spirit- Grammy nominated artist- girlfriend to a man worth 90mil- who is tall enough and cute enough- who displays his love for her. Why? your life seems to be what any 20 year old wou...

So I am up doing some grass roots research into pursuing some passions of mine... hair and fashion.  While texting a guy who is interested in me. And it hit me. I am ready to date again! Finally. Lordt I thought I was going to be stuck in that negative stage forever! By the way the title of this post is inspired by a podcast that I listened to- that helped get me through entitled: Single But READY.. check it out it is eye opening. So if you read some of my post from the August/September period you will note the harping of the breakup and my efforts to rebound date. Well I never wrote about my perspective of trying to rebound date. Let us just say it was horrible. I truly do not recommend trying to rebound date, while being celibate and on the tail ends of a heartbreak... Nothing good comes from Nazareth right? HA.. ok. Basically as I sat here thinking back to that time period I was sooo negative. Negative Nancy welcome to the party. These guys were showing genuine interest in m...

Recently I have been on my journey of discovery and paying more attention to me, my thoughts, my actions, my likes, my strengths, areas of improvement etc. Initially after "the breakup" I noted to self that my fear of rejection led me to make some foolish decisions and in turn I became someone I did not recognize. I had always known that I suffered slightly from some sort of fear of rejection and/or abandonment- which is why it took me forever to become close with anyone intimately where they knew my good and bad. I feared that they would not like "That ME" or that they would eventually leave me. These fears of rejection and abandonment stemmed from childhood experiences where I felt like I never quite made it into fitting in... I was always too something. Too tall, too dark, too skinny, too fat, too smart, too nice---- tooo tooo tooo I never was just  right for anything. 5 years old going to gymnastics class- which I thoroughly enjoyed and had begun to excel in...

Flew into Seattle- stayed for a night and drove to Vancouver. Wonderful trip! Very freeing for my mind and spirit. Places we ate: Zeeks Pizza- Seattle Rolls Kitchen- Sushi Vancouver Fat Burger- Yaletown Serious Pie- Seattle Ribs- Korean BBQ El Furniture Warehouse- Whistler Village (The donuts OMG) Grassroots Pizza- Whistler Village Nature is awesome- it constantly reminds me of God's greatness. The level of imagination, how everything works together, the beauty, the colors, the complexity and simplicity- seeing mountains up close and REAL SNOW! I am Texas born and bred so snow is a figment of our imagination we get slushed ice lol. Granville Island- wonderful shopping!! Cascadia soaps(purchased) made with goats milk and oils I bought like 5 bars! I love soap- weird...The fresh fudge, unwaxed apples! I was in market heaven. Capilano Suspension Bridge: AHHHHH I crossed it... I was totally scared going across but I looked down and the view was breathtaking. I wante...

So it is 9:38pm here in rainy Seattle. As I await my flight to DFW- I want to drop some knowledge on you. Feminism by definition is  the advocacy of women's rights on the grounds of political, social, and economic equality to men.  So the portion I want to focus on is the social aspect. I could argue this from several angles inclusive of the viewa of the beyhive and our independence from men. But I am not. I want to argue this from the social aspect of our intwined dependence of each other. So being a 90's era baby I fell in love with the mantra of anything you can do I can do better!  My inner competitor showed all through elementary from spelling bees to playing football and running track. I can be faster, stronger and smarter than any boy... And I believed that with every fiber of my being and for the most part I was successful in my beating of the boys. That was until middle school- when they suddenly were taller than me and stronger than me.... My interest shifted ...